I love church. I need church. But I've been a bit lost for many years trying to find a new church home. I finally left my home church about 4 years ago where I grew up my whole life, served as a young adult as the children and youth minister, and knew everyone. My family had very strong ties to that church, but the sad fact was it was/is dying out and really has nobody in my age group. I love all of the people there, it's like a church full of my grandparents! So cute!
So when I left my home church I visited and joined a mega-church about 20 minutes from my house. The pastor is awesome and has a heart for adoption...currently adopting his 5th child/his 3rd adopted child. The music and worship are fabulous. But it's so big, it is really hard to be connected. It's easy to get lost in the shuffle and never have to "do" anything. Nobody misses you if you aren't there. That's where I've been for 4 years...wandering around a church I love but feel lost in. I take the blame for not being connected. Because I haven't been the most faithful attender, I haven't really met anybody. I haven't joined a small group. etc....
I've been thinking I'd really love to attend a church closer to my home because in the future, when Molly comes it would just be nice not to travel down the interstate 20 minutes to/from church. Also as she grows into a young child and has more activities to go to it would make things easier if my church was in my community. The church I went to today is only 5 minutes from my home. It is a small-medium size church. Very nice pastor who gave a really good message that kind of kicked me in my butt this morning. I so needed to hear that! I'm not sure if I'll continue to go there or not but I may give it a few more visits.
I'm going to record some points from the message here mostly for my benefit. Don't feel like you have to read further as some of it may seem unconnected to you because they are just some of my notes.
His sermon was on "Re-discovering" a New Passion for life...John 10:10 and Mark 12:30
This was so good for me to hear because I need to rediscover the passion for God in my life. Somewhere along the way life has become boring and mundane and God doesn't want that for our lives. I learned that I have to connect to the power of God working in my life and it is the power of God that makes all things new.
Nothing great ever happens without passion.
Enthusiasm comes from words meaning God in us
Passion has to be fueled...the more time you spend away from God, the more you lose your fuel.
Daily Worship...everything should be done passionately as an act of worship to God. Present it to him as a living sacrifice.
Good intentions don't accomplish anything.
Intentionality means I'm starting now.
Carry out plans instead of making plans.
I specifically applied this message to an area of my life where I'm lacking a tremendous amount of passion right now and that is teaching. I'm not sure why, but I'm passionless about my job. I feel like I'm in a rut and I can't get out. I've considered switching careers, but I'm not sure what else I want to do in my life right now (besides be a wife and mother...but I digress). The adoption process and the prospect of being a mother this year has consumed me and those are the things I'm passionate about.
This must seem terrible to read, if you've made it this far. If you are a mother you don't want to think your child's teacher is passionless about her job! I understand. I mean I get to school and get the job done, I've done it for 13 years and it's natural to me I don't even think about it at times. But I need to put more into my job for my kids. I have some really great kids in my classroom this year. I could be doing more with them. I'm going to start this semester! I have some great ideas...tomorrow I will begin planning them out in order to make them a reality.
What have you done to find your passion in your career after many years?
5 comments:
Way to go, Amy! Getting up and going to a new church (and not watching Meet the Press) is a good step.
I went to church last night and was going to attend a Bible class this morning. I didn't sleep well last night (b/c of my rash, did I tell you about that?) and missed the class. I watched Meet the Press. Well, I'm just glad I went to service on Saturday night. I'll try to get to class next week.
Amy, I have been teaching 18 years and all in special education and although I have gone from Kindergarten aged to now Junior/Intermediate age I love my job. I have had times when I feel like I am down and out and don't want to teach I find a new theme or thing I want to teach and it moves me in a new way. There are so many restrictions with the curriculum it makes it hard sometimes to do new and creative things. As for your other issue I too left the church I joined when I moved to my home now. I was there when MacLean was little but she had no kids in Sunday school and it broke my heart because when I went to church as a kid it was loaded with families. I have now gone to the church my parents moved to and love it. Although MacLean won't go to sunday school she sits in church, I have taken an alpha course and am going to participate in a book/bible study on the Shack. I am excited and being in a big (not huge) church means there is more opportunity. I feel for you and understand what has been happening to you and you are in the best career to be a single mom, I have never had to put MacLean in day care in the summer and we get to spend all the holidays together. Anyway take care and good luck this week. I too am not happy to go back after any holiday. I have lots of behaviour kids in my room and it is draining. But I have two great education assistants who work with me so the days are good for the most part. Take care Amy and hope to chat soon.
Amy - I feel your anguish about the career. I am swithing careers from healthcare to education. for me, teaching is the best career for me as a single Mom - you will understand once Molly gets here. I was where you are last year, in a rut. I have a wonderful church family, and Mia is so happy there. You are smart to start looking for the "right church" before Molly gets here. I can't explain the feeling you have when you see your baby dressed as an angel singing in her first Christmas pagaent. You are in that waiting mode right now, but I can promise you, it will all change, soon. Hang in there with your career - have you thought about changing grades? It is amazing the motivation you get when you know that sweet angel is waiting for you to bring her home. Start getting ready for Molly's arrival, now, I just feel like this is your year!!
Hugs!
Angie
P.S. Spring consignment sales will be starting soon, and that will really get you motivated, hehe!! There is a fantastic one in Brentwood - I will let you know the dates when I get the email!
Hang in there!
This sounds like a GREAT sermon and yes what a lot of us need to hear. I am so glad that you will be looking for the passion in teaching again. I have no doubt that you will find it:)
and yet again...we are twins separated at birth. I left my home church - of which my uncle is the preacher - a few years ago. It's been very hard at times when we are together...everyone makes comments that I should be at my "families" church.
I too, am not all that happy where I am going...there are aspects of it that I love...and aspects of others that I love...but still nothing that just seems to fit.
It's easy to feel burnt out and passionless in teaching. People don't realize that if we didn't get our summers "off" we'd never make it! :) I will be praying as you work to make changes! And Maybe it's just God confirming to you that He wants you as a wife and a momma...and prayerfully soon!
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