What I got for my mom this year:
Yes, I actually planned way ahead for this Mother's Day and booked and purchased a cruise for mom and me to enjoy this summer. I've wanted to take mom on a cruise for a long time and thought this summer might be the perfect opportunity to do it before Molly gets here...although it looks as if it may be 2 more years before that happens. More on that later. Anyway I'm super excited that we will be able to do this together. We were concerned that we may not be able to go because getting her passport was a bit difficult due to the spelling of her name. (She spells it differently than her birth certificate shows). But I received a confirmation email this week that her passport is in the mail, so in one month we will be sailing through the Caribbean!
This poem was on one of my favorite blogs recently. I copied it and edited it a bit to fit my story and thought I'd post it today, on Mother's Day.
There are women who become mothers without effort,
without thought,
without patience or loss,
and though they are good mothers and love their children,
I know that I will be better.
I will be better not because of genetics or money or because I have read more books,
but because I have struggled and toiled for this child.
I have longed and waited.
I have cried and prayed.
I have endured and planned over and over again.
Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams.
I will notice everything about my child.
I will take time to watch my child sleep,
explore,
and discover.
I will marvel at this miracle every day for the rest of my life.
I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child, knowing that I can comfort, hold, and feed her.
My dream will be crying for me.
I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child.
Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child that God leads me to, I will not be careless with my love.
I will be a better mother for all that I have endured. I am a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend, and sister because I have known pain.
I know disillusionment, as I have been betrayed by fairy tale dreams, fantasies, and promises I believed would happen in my life.
I have prevailed.
I have succeeded.
I have won.
So now, when others hurt around me, I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs.
I listen.
And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely.
I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth when life is beyond hard.
I have learned a compassion that only comes by walking in those shoes. I have learned to appreciate life.
Yes, I will be a wonderful mother.
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